***6 THINGS YOUR GUY WANTS TO SAY BUT CAN’T*** #1: It can be quite challengi…

***6 THINGS YOUR GUY WANTS TO SAY BUT CAN’T*** #1: It can be quite challenging to not like someone your #SignificantOther loves and even more difficult to inform your loved one of your feelings. Perhaps since your guy is in your inner circle, he witnesses the emotional ramifications after you interact with this person. Maybe unbeknownst to you, you become more critical of yourself, the #relationship, your body, your life, experience sadness, etc. as a result of the opinions or interactions with this person. Unfortunately, many of us give a ‘pass’ to individuals because of their #relationship to us (i.e. family) or the duration of #time we have known them (i.e. we were best friends in 1st grade). Just because certain #behaviors are normal, it does not mean it #healthy. Sometimes, it takes an outside (new) person (i.e. significant other) to witness the dynamic to point out the obvious. #LoveGrows Tip: If you have an initial emotional response to something your signficant other says (in this case his opinion/thoughts about your loved one/friend) ask yourself the following before responding: Do I think my significant other is trying to hurt me by saying this? If yes, then you will need to ask yourself why you are partnered with someone who you believe would intentionally hurt you. If no (which is often the case), then there are a few things to consider: (a) listen to your signficant other’s perspective (objectively, not defensively), (b) remove your loved one from the equation and HONESTLY assess how you would feel if someone else treated you in the same manner as your loved one (the person your guy does not like). If you do not consider this behavior, etc. an issue, respectfully convey this to your significant other and your reasons. Family and friendship dynamics vary and what is deemed unacceptable, rude, etc for one may be acceptable for another. By sharing your reasons with your significant other you are conveying to him what is deemed normal in your circle. Although acceptable in your family and within your friendships, your signficant other may view this as unacceptable and voice his preference to not participate in it and it’s important to know that this is okay. It is imperative that both parties feel emotionally safe in the relationship to express what they do and do not want ©. – Misha N. Granado

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